Becoming self-control for children
Self – conscious regulation of man’s own state, motives and actions based on their comparison with some subjective norms and perceptions. Becoming self-control – one of the central mechanisms of socialization; it is associated with the assimilation and acceptance of human society developed standards of conduct, the transformation of the objective (existing independently of man) in the internal rules inherent to a particular person self-regulation mechanisms. The emergence and development of self-determined society requirements for human behavior. Thus, self – socially mediated phenomenon inherent to man as a social being.
As a result, self-conscious choice made permissible and most appropriate forms of response to the circumstances surrounding reality. Including the screening takes place in thought and action, which are inadequate to reality. Thus, an important aspect of self-control advocates self-restraint, the ability to abandon unproductive and disapproved by society reactions. This ability is not inherent in man initially, but is formed gradually with the development of the individual.
The child is born as a biological entity, for which is not characterized by social forms of behavior regulation. Initially, the driving mechanism of activity of the baby are the only of its own basic urges and needs. Their satisfaction is entirely in the hands of the adult and the child only able to express their motivations in the form of simple reactions (crying, screaming, physical activity). Child development is the gradual development of their appropriate practical action, by which it acquires the ability to self-satisfy their individual needs. This process is carried out in communion with the adult, under his direct supervision. As part of the joint venture initially adult primary role; He directs and controls the actions of the child shows to be the assimilation patterns of behavior, evaluates and controls. Thus, the control mechanisms are the first child for both external, existing independently of him; their support is an adult. Parents and caregivers not only offer the child certain behaviors, but also to demonstrate the consequences that result from a given action. As a result, multiple repetitions of the child masters the causal nature of human activity, gradually acquires the ability to foresee the results of a step. Over time, this becomes prejudge the outcome of an independent regulator and sufficient activity. The child is able to avoid certain actions, entailing adverse consequences, because mentally (internally) imagines these consequences and does not want them to attack. The development of this ability is related to the resolution of certain internal contradictions. On the one hand, the child’s impulsive motives pushing him to some steps; on the other hand – there is already braking experience of similar meaning external influence (disapproval, punishment, etc.). The outcome of such a conflict may be different. If a child has a reasonable opportunity to meet their basic needs, and external controls do not plunge him into a situation of deprivation, it is quite susceptible to reasonable restrictions and gradually develops them as their own, inherent to himself conduct regulators. But in excess of limits when the emotional, educational and other needs of the child are blocked, the contradiction between their own motivation and external constraints experienced painful. From an adult it is also dependent to self-restraint, a derivative of external constraints, not only advocated its negative side for the child, but it would be encouraged and approved. Becoming self-control takes place as a child awareness of the fact that the choice of the optimal solution is not a rejection of the goals, and the way to achieve acceptable means.
In an atmosphere of excess and overly stringent restrictions characteristic of authoritarian parenting, external demands are perceived as hostile and alien; there is no assignment of them as their own, inherent human norms. The formation of ability to self-control is difficult; the child not only seeks to internalize social norms, but by demonstrating adherence to it out of fear of punishment, trying whenever possible to avoid them. Therefore, the situation of total external control leads to a negative result: the child does not form capacity for independent ethical evaluation.
Another undesirable option of educational policies – the so-called permissive style is when the child is insufficient motivation governed by elders.
In these circumstances, the child simply is not able to learn the mechanisms of self-control and self-restraint.
Optimal educational strategy is gradual delimitation of controlling and evaluating the functions of the adult and the child. At the earliest stages of development, the child is not capable of self-control and in need of external regulation of their behavior. adult role while leading. Gradually the child acquires the ability to act independently and judgments. adult task – in proportion to the rate of formation of the ability to pass on to the child’s rights and obligations under the regulation of one’s own behavior. At every stage the ratio of foreign and domestic regulation changes until the person reaches the ability to fully evaluate, and guide their behavior. Achieving this kind of ability, and marks the onset of psychological and social maturity.